Matters of the heart

All morning this topic has plagued my mind and I decided that instead of just going on and on about it in my head I might as well put it down since I cant seem to stop thinking about it.

Break ups I think is a touchy subject. Touchy because every single persons relationship is different from the next. Its really hard to put yourself in someones shoes and advice them on how to deal with their break up because you really were not in that relationship. How they felt is something you will not understand no matter how relatable their situation is to yours. Everyones feelings are different so you cant just come out and tell someone to snap out of it. Our dealing mechanisms are different as well. Some people break up today, and tomorrow they are over it. Some people break up today and 2 years down the road they are still mourning the demise of their relationship. I wont tell you which type of person I am but I will tell you this. I love hard but when I finally let go there is no looking back no matter what our relationship was like. Yes yes, I do believe that if you and whoever are meant to be together you will be together but in that instance I leave that up to fate, other than that I pack my bags and move on especially when I am through.

Anyway I cannot talk about this topic without putting my two cents in. This is my take on break ups and it might sound sorta harsh but I think sometimes it the approach you might have to take. Break ups are hard, after spending some amount of time with anyone its hard to break away and not let it upset you. Sometimes one person may walk away feeling better about the break up than the other but none the less leaving a relationship is hard and I do believe that for your own benefits its important to mourn the end of the relationship but remember this. The person didnt die, they just decided to leave your life its sad yes it is but dont sit around crying about it forever. Take your time for sure there is no rush but also remember that its not the end of the world. God may bring someone into your life to teach you something but it doesnt mean he brought them in to keep them there. Take the lessons you learned from the relationship and use that to move on to the next one. Every one brings something to your life that enhances it in some way. It may not seem that way at the time but if you look back you realise they brought something to your life that you didnt have before. Might be strength to be able to carry you through the next phase of your life, It might be love because they came when you had given up on love, might be reassurance because you were beginning to wonder when that good man will come your way or good woman. Either way they bring something to your life that you may not have had before or you need a reminder of but that doesnt mean they are there to stay.

Another thing we all tend to do when we leave someone we truly cared about is use them as a blue print for all other relationships. We place them high on a pedastal where its almost impossible for anyone to measure up to the standards they set in your life. I am guilty of that so I know what I mean. Its good to have someone who set the standards high but remember they set the standard for that period of time. Dont get me wrong, I am not say go from a winner to a loser thats definitely not what I am expressing here but just like my fingerprint blog, no two people are made the same, not even twins. Everyone has their own unique factor that makes them unique so Person A may have brought something into your life that you now cant seem to live without but Person B will come wiht something completely different that you may need in your life at that particular point in time. Either way each person comes into your life with something completely different just be open and willing to give each person a chance to be themselves in your relationship and dont punish them for the mistakes of the person before. Its not their fault you were in the situation before they came in. Allow them to make their own mistakes but also know what you need and deserve and make sure you dont allow them to make the same mistakes as before.

Most importantly I think its important that you dont sit around waiting for the person who left your life to come back into it. Yes as the saying goes if they are meant to be in your life they will be. However living your life expecting them to come back will prevent you from moving forward. God takes people out of our lives to prepare us to receive better people. If you hold on to something God has taken out of your life you are blocking yourself from receiving what God really wants us to have. So like I said before, take your time to mourn the loss of your relationship but also remember that its not the end. Wake up ready to move on and accept that what happened in your life happened but there is also more to come so embrace your fate and move on. As I type this I do not type this alone to share but I type this for myself cus I do understand its easier said than done but I also know that as hard as letting go is, it has to happen and you can only move forward if you let go.

Break ups are hard but just remember its Gods way of preparing you for something better. Embrace it, accept it and wait for your blessing because he/she is coming...might be a little lost right now but they are on their way!