All rounded

In life, when we start building relationships and friendships you usually start out with an endless amount of people in your life. As you grow older and wiser you realise that the endless amount of people you have in your life gradually become countable to a point where you might actually be able to count the "all rounded" people on one hand. You might view this as a good or bad thing depending on who you are and how you view life but I'll break it down to you in a few and you can decide for yourself if this is a good or bad thing.

I used to be that person who considered everyone a good friend. I dont know how many countless arguments I had with my mom about this topic where she always said "You and your everyone is my friend mentality" At that time I used to find her statement annoying and I would always say she didnt know what she was talking about but the older I got, the more I understood why she would be upset with me thinking everyone was a good friend when really they werent.

Now dont get me wrong. In no shape or form would I say any of these people who used to be in my life are bad people. Nor would I say they were bad for me because I like to believe I am a good judge of character so anyone who was in my life at some point in time was a good person. I just believe that as I grew older and as they did as well, we realised that our relationship was not destined to last through the time and we just drifted apart. I am sure this is not unusual to anyone. It happens, your relationships change, you have different goals in life, you move away and you just lose touch. I am pretty sure you might run into each other at some point in your life, share pleasantries reminsicing on old times, walk away smiling but wont for a second regret them no longer being in your life. In fact you might thank God they came into your life for the period of time they were in and keep it moving.

I am sure you have all heard that analogy about the leaves, branches, roots or the seasons kind of friendship and its all true, however I want to branch off a little bit and say something completely different. You may have heard it before so it wont be completely brand new to you but for those of you who havent, pay attention.

Just because you will go out of your way for a friend, doesnt necessarily mean they will do the same for you. I believe thats why its written in the bible that when you give, give whole heartedly with no expectations of getting anything in return because you might never get anything in return but the feeling that you did something great for someone. Like they always say your reward is in heaven and I truly believe that. I say this because most of us go out of our way to help a friend but when the tables are turned and they don't do the same for us we become extremely upset and want to make them feel guilty for not reciprocating the favour. Seriously though, why should they? Unless you signed some piece of paper saying that if I do this for you, you have to do the same for me when I need you to they owe you absolutely nothing. Of course ethically and morally it seems like the right thing to do but really why should they?

I like to say to people all the time that you should know who you are friends are and what you can depend on them for. You might have a friend that you know that if you needed financial assistance they will be the first to write you a check. Yet, if you need a place to stay for awhile they will be the last person to offer you a place. There are some people that you know that if you have some good news to share they will be the first to run to the mountains to celebrate your good news with you. However if you need their opinion on a pressing matter they will be the first person to discourage you from doing it. There are also people in your life that you know no matter what your problem is they will be there to support you no matter what. They are the ones I call the all rounded friends. Your all rounded friends are usually very few...at times they may be just one person and if you are lucky to be blessed with an all rounded friend thank your stars and keep them close.

By no means shape of form does it mean the other people in your life who are not all rounded are bad because believe it or not, you are not everyones all rounded friend. Just like you cant help everyone who comes your way, is the same way they cant do the same for you.

All I am saying is, dont get upset with anyone who cant come through for you when you need them. You obviously do not know why they can't be your all rounded friend. It doesnt mean that when the tables are turned and they need you, you also hold back. Just know what purpose they serve in your life and keep it moving. Whatever the case is, they are in your life for a reason so thank God for their purpose in your life and keep it moving because like I said you are not everyones all rounded freind as well.