He's mine

This topic always gets me heated whenever I have a discussion on this. I know a lot of people feel differently about this topic so I would very much appreciate it if I got comments on this blog. Lets make this a lively discussion. No judgement just pure opinions.

If you know me, you know I am a reality show junkie. I pretty much anything reality based...well not everything but most things. I just finished watching this new reality show that started up this past Jan called "fly girls" Its about a bunch of flight attendants for Virgin Atlantic and their daily lives as flight attendants on and off the job. The 5 women all live together in one apartment "the crash pad" and they have developed a very tight bond...more or less like best friends. There is always some type of drama with them but at the end of the day they stay friends. Anyways part of todays story lines was one girl met a guy in the club, they were vibing, they connected and the guy invited her to a beach party the next day. The girl really liked this guy and yes she had only known him for a few hours but pretty much she had was into him. The next day she goes to the beach party with her friends, her friends knowing exactly why they were going. They knew the girl was going to see the guy she met the night before. Long story short, the girls other friend got hit on by the guy this girl liked and she allowed him. They exchanged numbers all infront of the other girl. Of course the girl was livid, she invites her friend out to hang out with her and the new guy she met and one of them walks away with the very guy she lay claim on. Anyways so the girl starts to date the guy and its a huge argument between the girls. The girl said chicks before dicks and she does not understand why the girl knew she liked the guy yet she still went ahead and took the guys number and went behind her back to meet up with the guy. She no longer trust her and doesnt believe they can maintain a friendship.

Okay so I am sure a number of you are going to say, Well the girl knew the guy for but a minute, he wasnt her man, they werent even dating so he is up for grabs. Yes thats true he could be up for grabs but personally I believe, that once you consider someone a good friend, a best friend, it doesnt matter if she spotted the guy in the club or not. Thats your friends interest. If he doesnt like her so be it, but why should you go chasing after him. I mean a man will be a man and quite frankly I dont blame the guy. He obviously knew that the other girl was no one to him just yet so he is free to do what he likes, but I like to think that as a friend, you cant stop who will approach you but you can definitely stop it from going anywhere.

The other argument could be well what if the guy is the guy thats meant for you? ARe you supposed to give him up because your girl saw him first? No I am not saying that either because you really can't help who is meant for you, but as a good friend I think the best approach would be to approach the girl, let her know the guy came up to you, you guys vibed and clicked and though you understand that she likes him but you like him too will it be okay if she started seeing him? She might not be happy about that but she will appreciate the honesty and who knows if she is a good friend herself she will know the guy is not into her and actually say go for it.

Another thing I do not understand, is women who choose to date married men? Or the ones who think that its okay to go after a man with a girlfriend. It doesnt make sense to me. Yes I understand that the world we live in there are fewer men then thare women but does it mean that if you see someone with a boyfriend its your place to go after them????? Also why must you always go after that married man when you know he is married? I mean seriously? What do you have to gain for going after a married man? I mean this is a union God has ordained are you going to break something God has put together? I think thats just Karma waiting to happen. Plus what makes you so sure that the married man cheating on his wife will not cheat on you with someone else? I just dont get it.

Anyway this one of my biggest upsets and I really dont understand. Maybe I am not as aggressive and maybe thats why I am single but I believe in Karma and I believe what goes around comes around. Going after someone who isnt yours will definitely come back to bite you in your asses.

Ladies tell me what you think? What's your take on this topic. All I can say is, I now understand why some women expect every woman to leave their home when they leave. I also understand why some women keep their relationships a secret and refuse to introduce their men to their girlfriends. We all know the kind of friends we have so you can't blame a woman for taking precaution.

Its not her fault

I just had a very interesting episode happen in my life. Never ever has this happened to me and most of you might freak out after you hear what happened to me but everything is okay. It has inspired this blog so here we go.

Earlier on this evening, I get home from work, exhausted ready to just sit back eat my sushi and watch grey's anatomy before I hit the sack and then I remembered my dog on my form on farmville had not been fed and if you dont feed the poor dog it runs off and then you have to pay 2 farmville cash to get the dog back. I already had to pay before to get the damn dog back wasnt about to spare my 2 farmville dollars to get it back again. Of course I sign on to facebook and then suddenly a girl I added a few days ago. Now this is my mistake for adding her because I have never met this girl in my life nor do I want to know her after what happened but the reason I accepted her friend request was because she is a mutual friend of this radio host I sometimes comment on his page and i didnt want to seem rude by not accepting her friend request and one day her seeing me on his page. Of course I shouldnt care since I dont know her but I felt like being nice. Anyways the girl comes online and starts talking to me on facebook chat. Her salutation alone was offensive enough, I should have realised where this was going.

Long story short, this girl believes I have been having relations with her man and wants revenge on me. I originally didnt know what the hell she was talking about until she mentioned my cousins name and then I began to wonder if I really knew this girl or not. My cousin has no clue who she is either. Anyway, she then threatens my life and decides that the next time she sees me she is going to kill my cousin and I. Mind you the man she is talking about, I never knew he existed till she told me what his name was and quite frankly with a name like that, there is no way on God's green earth would i date a man with that name. I dont think I am above anyone but in some situations I really think I am. Anyway my cousin and I both got on her, called her out, told her we were going to report her to the police and finally we blocked and reported her profile to Facebook. Hopefully they do something about that. Anyway the point of my blog is not to come on here and talk about her but rather what i learnt from this situation.

First and foremost, Ladies, if your man is cheating on you, why do you find it necessary to attack the woman. Yes its trifling if you know the woman personally but how about the one you are committed to? He is the one you are dealing with not the woman. If you have a problem with him go to him. Dont attack the woman, Most times the woman didnt eve know you existed and if she did, sometimes she really was given the impression that the relationship was already dead. I amnot saying some women dont go out of their way to be with men who are already in relationship because there are some women out there like that but seriously, Your problem is with your man not her. What makes me laugh the most is when you see a woman whose man has cheated on her only about a hundred times and she chooses to stay with him, yet she will call the women he cheated on her with all the names in the book, hunt her down to beat her down, report her to her boss and pretty much do whatever it takes to destroy her life but the man goes scott free.

Its time we actually dealt with the problem and the one who created the problem. Yes the woman is to blame but the man is the one with the problem. Cut him loose, deal with him, and leave the other woman out of it. If she is your friend then let her know straight up that you are done with her but if you are gong to be done with her, be done with your man too. It takes two to tango.