I know its been awhile...lets just say I allowed life to take control but I am back and hopefully with some insightful things to say.
As you may know, I recently celebrated my birthday and for those of you who know me and know me well, you know my birthday is a pretty big deal. I love my birthdays because its that one day in the yea where I feel like its okay to be exactly who I am because people will love and tolerate me at least for the day. Not to say i become a complete brat but I like the feeling of feeling special and having all the attention on me for a change...but not only does it make me feel special but its also a chance for me to really reflect on my life and see how far I have come and how far I still have to go. This birthday was no different and once again I reflected on how far I have come and how far I have yet to go.
Recently the topic of love has been on my mind a lot...what does love really entail, why are we willing to deal with people who may not feel the way we do or why do we know we love someone yet still turn around and break their heart. I cant say i have come up with any solid answers but I have discussed this with a few people and each have different opinions on the matter but the one thing that they all said in common was when you find love, nothing or no one will stop you for going for it.
Often times, we think we have found the one. We believe in our hearts that the person we are hopelessly in love with is the one. Yet they give us every reason in teh book why they are not the one. They are not as attentive to us, they seem to have all the excuses in the book as to why you and them just cant be together and they just dont seem to show that they care enough to really make you feel like they are the ones for you. Despite all their actions we still hold on and pray that the they change and they suddenly start doing everything to prove to you that they are the ones. In the mean time, we may be passing on other opportunities with other people because we believe in our hearts of hearts that your "one" is really the one.
I had a really interesting conversation with my cousin today and she went in...i was actually quite surprised because although I know she can be very expressive when she is passionate about something I have never really seen her really go on about anything. She pretty much said, there is nothing in this world that will prevent you from being with someone if you really care for them. It doesnt matter if you have oceans seperating you, you are not in the financial position you want to be in, or you just dont think you have the emotional strength to keep going. when you love someone all you can think about is being with that person so if it means you have to deal with all the clear obstacle and unclear obstacles in your way you will do it. The minute someone is not willing to jump that first hurdle for you, there is a possiblity they never will. So this is when you need to ask yourself, Are you willing to wait till they decide to at least jump one hurdle, or are you going to move on and find that one who is willing to swim the ocean for you if it means they can have you?
Of course nothing she has said was new to me, hell I have shared that same opionion and thoughts with others but it really put it into perspective coming from her because knowing she was in a situation where there were soo many obstacles in her way yet she was dealing with each obstacle everyday because all she wanted was to be with her signficant other made me realise that nothing in this world should hold me back or anyone back from being with who you love.
that being said, love is a two way straight, you must give to receive just as you must receive to give, so yes you may be willing to jump off the boat and swim an ocean for that person but if they are not willing to do the same then whats the point? This is really when you must decide in your heart that are you willing to let go of your "one" to find the one who wants you as their "one" as well or are you going to keep holding on and praying that your one finally sees you as your one even if it means you miss out on something thats even greater and better than what you have set out for yourself.
Before I finally end this, just remember this. In life we all have things we want and hope for and we will do everything in our power to get it even if the odds are against us and it just seems like the more we try the more we fail. But make sure that whatever you are fighting for is really what you are meant to have. Sometimes God is the reason these things are not working because he knows there is something bigger and better in store for us and he wants us to be patient as he prepares it for us. So all I will say is learn to let go and Let Go. The heart can heal...the heart will heal so learn to say goodbye....as Beyonce said...I finally found the good in bye. Have you ever looked back in your life and saw the person you were hopeless in love with turned out to be completely wrong for you? and you ask yourself what did i see? Well maybe one day you will say the same about the person you just cant seem to let go of even though you really should.
